#2 Leather-bound Pocket recorder
Words for Oktoberfest; especially when drunk.
Was kostet das? – How much is it?
(custet)
Ich will ein Mas Bier Bitten – I’d like to have one beer please
Wie gefiellt Dir meine Brille? – How do you like my glasses
(gi-felt) (mine-a)
hot – heiss; cold – kalt; rainy – regnenisch
(rigne-nish)
cloudy – wolkig; sunny – sonnig; windy – windig
(volkeg) (vindig)
Ish schlafe/lebe in einem uldhm/van – I sleep/live in a van
(sh-la-fa) (eye-n-am)
Wenn ich betrunken bin – When I am drunk
(roll the r)
Ich tanze fuer gell – I dance for money
Ich leiebe Munich – I love Munich
Ich war auf den weisin! – I’ve been to Okctoberfest
(vee-sin)
Ich kenne karate – I know karate
Ich kann ein handstand wenn ich betrunken ben. Fur eine sekunde. –
(hant-stant) (se-coon-da)
I can do a handstand when I’m drunk. For one second.
Hast du schommal einen mann mit einem bart gekusst. -
(shoon-mal) (geck-coost)
Have you ever kissed a man with a beard
Mochtest due es probieren. – Would you like to try.
(mesh-test) (pro-beer-in)
Deutscher – German
Ish mag das – I like that/this/it
Es ist mehr als nur – it’s more than just…
(meir) (isles) (new-a)
Ich bin schon ohne bart – I am beautiful underneath
(ben) (shoon)
Ich vie so kuschlig wie ein panda bar – I am as cuddly as a Panda Bear
(been) (vee) (paan-da)
Und ich konnte dir die klamotten vom korper reissen. -
(kunt-ta) (die-na) (fom) (k-ur-pair) (rice-en; roll the r)
And I could rip your clothes off.
Ich wette ich (kann) mein bier sonneller trinken als du! -
(vet-te) (can) (isles)
I bet I can drink my beer faster than you!
Wor ist das nachste betrunkene madchen? - Where is the nearest drunk girl
(next-ta) (druken-a) (metch-n)
Du trinkst wie ein madchen. – You drink like a girl
Verstehst du mich – Do you understand me?
(fear-steh-st) (mish)
Dein dindl ist schon- Your dress is beautiful
(shoon; or ohn for beautiful)
Ich mache gute bies. - I make good babies
(mack-a)
Ich mache bute brezel. – I make good pretzels
Moks du – do you like
Goodbye – Tschuse (choose)
Where – Wo (voo)
How much – Wie viel (vee feel)
Who – wer (ver)
Tomorrow – morgan ( hold the o.)
Yesterday – gestern (guest-on)
1 – ein 2 – zwei (z-why) 3 – drei (dry) 4 – vier (fear) 5 – funf (foon-f)
6 – sechs (secks) 7 – sieben (zee-ban) 8 – acht (ockt) 9 – neun (noon) 10 – zehn
black – Schwartz (shwas)
red – rot (roll the r)
yellow – gelb
green – grun (groon)
blue – blau (blah-oo)
white – weiss (vice)
pink – pink
Where did she go? - Woist sie hinegangen?
Where are the restrooms – wo sind die toiletten
(dee) (too-let-in)
Can I have another beer – Bekomme ich ein Bier
(beh-com-a)
What is your name – wei heisst du
(doo)
My name is – ich heisse
(high-sa)
Where are you from – wo kommst du her
(here)
I like you – Ich mag dich
(dish)
You are beautiful – du bist schon
You are pretty – du bist hubsch
(hoop-ch)
This is my friend – das ist mein freundt
I’m with Chris @ Oktoberfest. His friend/co-worker notices some girls walking around and says, “Hey if you can’t find a seat you can always sit on my face.” Pointing @ his, fingers circling like windshield wipers. (Chuck).
They call me Billy Walsh. There are 8 of us at this table.
We’re outside
Funnier things were said following Chucks “sit on my face,” but can’t remember.
“I think she’s a lesbian… But I’d like to see her go down on her friend.” Chuck
“16 is legal in Germany.” Me
I’m hungry – ich habe hunger
(haba)
I don’t want to leave – ich will nicht gehen
(nish-st) (gee-hen)
We are leaving – wir gehen
(via)
I’m thirsty – ich habe durst
What is the cheapest – was ist das billigste
(bill-ig-sta)
Is that one free – ist hier frei
(here) (fry)
Train: Obermenzing (van location)
Hackerbrucke (Oktoberfest location)
We lost Angel, man down. “Think he went back to the hotel to sleep.” Hung-over. Chris was telling me this morning he was in the shower, Angel(Tyler) came in and just puked. “Lol, he just knocked and puked.” “I didn’t even get a knock.”
I love how everybody is wearing Leder Hosens’ and Dindls’. Even if the girl isn’t that good-looking, the dindl makes them hot.
“Ya, we’re making an album. Everywhere we go in Europe.” I say, “what, a fuck album?” Chris was looking at the camera and she snagged it from his hands; which eluded to the question. “Wait,” then she laughed surprisingly. They have pictures of them naked and fucking. “Ya, we can’t let his parents see the fucking camera.” “Lol, literally,” Chris says.
Hey, hey! Everyone sees Angel walking towards us. “Where have you been?” Someone asks. “I was sleeping under some horses.” Haha, WTF. “Ya right over there,” he points towards the… He’s been gone over an hour. I ate most of his left over wiener. These Germans have some great sausage.
Ein Prosit, ein Prosit der Gemuhbichkeit (pretty sure I just spelt that word incorrectly.)
“She looks like a maid for Kleenex.” “Who,” I said. “Ugly pants.”
I’m drunk. Some guy just drank beer out of his shoe. His friend was kicking him in the ass. Bastard. On my 3 ½ liter. 25 minutes past 2.
Someone takes my pocket recorder and writes:
My name is John Jimmons. Your literature rocks. Angel is still here & reppin’ the pigtails. Beer taste great. Oktoberfest is AWESOME! Keep it real!
He gives it back now.
Mexico guy that I met here writes down: !Que pedo wey!! vdpggarcia@gmail.com (facebook)
He gives it back now.
“The van smells like beer.” Nina said after opening the van door. I smell my shirt. Oh ya, I smell like beer, “Oktoberfeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeest! I have been sleeping in the van the last three nights. Oh shit, it’s Monday. I always time travel when I’m drunk. The best is when you pull a Dr.Who: when you wake up drunk in a phone booth in London.
Currently driving back to Ingelheim. Chris ole good o’boy, Chris and his friends saved me so much money. Fucking love those guys (and girl.) I only paid for two beers in the three days of Oktoberfest. And I only paid for those beers because I lost a bet to Lena. Oscars, best male actor award last year (2009.) I could have fucking sworn it was Mickey Roark. GD it. I remember his speech and his tears rolling down his eyes like a baby rolling down a flight stairs; it was so emotional. So… One beer for her and the other for me. Wow, thinking about that, it was my last beer in Munchen. Wow, we closed that place down. Wow, Chuck and Chris were drunk. Wow, WTF happened to Chuck? Drunk and horny walking the strip of Okctoberfest. May lust be with you my friend, that and a drunken girl.
The song “Oh oh her she comes… She’s a man eater.” Invokes memory and provokes emotions. Trigger effect/windmill.
Anna writes in book:
Deutsches Eck Koblenc (pretty sure I spelt that last consonant wrong)
Once there was a German Cowboy. (Before Germany was even founded). He had he horses with the biggest balls. He was very proud of his eggy horses. He decided that he needed a big country for his horses. He asked all different countries and founded Germany. He builded the monument with the names of the different parts of the new big-ball-horse-country. On top he rebuilded this biggest horse with the biggest balls and him self on top. Through this people could remember the biggest balls in the country.
And that’s her story she wrote down.
Hitch hiking Germany, www.mitfahrgelegenheit.de
Bus +49/030/86096211
Clemence Leboucher
Georg Bouhemm
the fucking Texas guy, he wrote in book
Clemence writes:
I met in Dresden… I can’t write the rest because her hand writing I can not understand. And she wrote in French.
What a night, just like Timmy in Barcelona, “I don’t wanna leave.”
But… once again. When you do not aggress or attempt to gain what you want, somebody else will. With me, I must at least attempt. Failure is not from attempting and not accomplishing because that is a lesson/experience learned. Failure is from not attempting. I have always heard, “reach for your dreams!” Well, at least try and attempt. Do not worry/fear/or pity upon what might happen if you fail. Just try. Please, Brandon for your own sake, for pleasure, not necessarily for accomplishment but for extinguishment of regret. Do I regret? Of course, of course. Why? Because of… I did not have the… not courage but insecurity, not that I did not believe but… b/c…
I know what I want! So why? WHY? I do not know myself.
Stephen Kirchhof
0178-7168954
Frank Siegert
01577/2791948
Jacek Szkotnik’s reference about me:
“As you probably can see from his profile Brandon is a bit strange, but it is positive strangeness. He is quite chaotic (I would even dare to say stochastic) but it makes him really funny (to the point that I was thinking about taking notes from is quotes).
As a guest he was self-sufficient and able to enjoy the little things.
Just to summarize, he was one of the best guests, he even did not try to sexually harass my Swiss flat mate.”
You can see why I like this guy.
Last.fm.de > RADIO > MOTOWN SOUL
Germany Sept. 30th, 2010
I’m at the Lebowski, a pub up the street 1 block turn right and on the left side beside Queens bar. “I don’t want to leave!” The Big Lebowski plays on the TV. Place is as big as a hallway. Great atmosphere. Clemence is beside me. Hallo! Bowling shoes hang down. I hang around. People are smoking. < Don’t cry baby don’t cry – in a French accent. Love it, when women speak French it is sexy, guy speaking French you want to punch in the face. The décor is attributed to the Lebowski. AWESOME. Love!
The bathroom for guys says “DUDES,” Jesus bowls. Nobody fucks with the Jesus! Nobody. I make excited noises. Old man looks then turns back to the bar. We want to steal the Walter picture. >Start a fire, everybody runs. We take the painting. – Jesus cleans his ball! We laugh. > Eight year olds dude. – We laugh. Love it
People smoke their rolled cigarettes. Girl on red sitty thing has great legs, short but nice, with black stockings. Guy she is with looks like a greaser. Good-looking couple. Hands are all over her crossed legs. I think the older women behind me are farting. Nasty smell too. Damn close corner farts. I do it all the time. Not around girls I’m trying to impress though; well… maybe, if we are moving… away from the blast area.
You fucked it up man.
Choverchaves
I don’t roll on Choverchaves
Mr.Lebowski do you find the word… offensive…Vagina.
Clemence rolls me a cigarette. I light it with the Lebowski matches
Sex, it’s fun. You like coitus?
He makes a White Russian. I drink mine with a toast in honor.
Bunny Lebowski
He fixes the TV. Don’t be so naïve.
Clemence writes in book: Don’t leave! Stay here forever!
She write something in French again but I cannot quite read it but it ends like this: So, comme de… Jackie let’s suck my 39!
We ditch the straws in our White Russian Lebowski style. Old school Jazz plays in the background. Trumpet, trombone, like Oliver.
Sitt’n on the morning sun. Watch’n as time
Dock of the bay. Watching time
Dude crashes.
German guy writes in my book, he might be French: Lebowski Rocks! Walter Sohchak “Remember the …” omeones head is in the way… 364” . I don’t know Walter Sohchak, maybe I should know.
VIVE LES MESSAGES!
He gives the book back now
>White Russian, he just said White Russian. – We toast!
A’tes souhaits! Don’t know what this means, was written down by someone in book at bottom.
I sneezed, twice. Someone writes: “HATSCHI!! HATSCHI!!,” “et bien oir, a’ tes awoues.
I have book back now
I hate the fuck’n Eagles man.
Lebowski is at the bar. End of movie.
3rd White Russian 1:35 in the morning here
Simon writes in book: Rote Flord (opera house) free vegan food on Monday and Thursday at 21:06. Street Scheulterblatt
I have book back now
When people ask me what my favorite vegetable is I tell them Stephen Hawkins. No really, I think a bell pepper. I just started eating them raw in Ingelheim. Now I eat them all the time raw.
Get to either Bulworst on the U2 or Yorckstron U7 and various S-bahn lines
+49 151 2296 4479
Address Bulowstr 59
10783, Berlin
ring bell for Stroud, David.
Kris Dirk, Belgium Dude
Bus 104 direction Westend. Change at Rathus get @ Neukoedn,Rothouse,Noyecom
Change to the U on the subway direction.
Spandau
Set out
Yorkstreet
54n Ring till Sudkreut
take S25 or S2
I just remembered the American guys in my hostel the 3rd night, had a blow-up sheep with them. “She’s our mascot.” Plastic blow-up sheep with a plastic hole and black leg stockings. Hilarious. Jade came out of the room @ 3:50 in the morning “They smell like Kebab! I can’t sleep!” I was drunk laying in the hallway. Michelle, Jacquie, Simon, and me and now Jade. I lay for another hour then go to sleep.
“There are no ugly women, just men that don’t drink.” Alex
Google huxleys neue welt
“Mary & Max” animated Australian film
@ Room 77 w/ Alan, Sophia, and her friends that are 23 and engaged. The musician here is “shite,” says Alan. Fuck ya I agree. “No flirting.” He’s serious, and I agree. She is cold with her looks. I only asked her, her opinion on “which burger is the best.” Radio is on now, great now my ears can relax. I thought Sophia was bring Swiss girls, oh well. We’re still going to party.
The menu reads:
Warm Beer, Cold Women and Fast Food… made slow.
The cold woman part is true. Very attractive though. Skinny, tall, and dressed in black. Spanish music that sounds Turkish plays. Sounds great. Hans (David) just yawned. Oh no! Cute blonde at the table full of gay guys. Good for me. Place is packed now, and one of the two women to my immediate right at the bar is good good looking, dressed in black as well. Plus this place is low lit with candles.
Beers are cheap and the Burgers are, “Best Fucking Burgers In Town,” so reads the chalkboard outside below and to the right of the Rom 77 light.
As an athlete you remember your mistakes; that feeling of failure and never ever wanting to repeat that mistake. Learning, training, remembering. There are many great moments, even some lucky ones, the BestOnes! Bet I always strive to be better, compete and win. While traveling there have been so many struggles but it is the great moments that I remember. I will never forget, and love to think and reminisce about the Experience!
Crystal Ball next to Sin Bar
Apparently, due to imperial observations Transvesticies wear leopard spotted neck scarf’s. An older German with a bike stops and looks as well. Then touches my shoulder genteelly and softly, and kindly asks in German (after I finally understand her after 2 minutes into conversation) if I pray to God “Catholic” or “Muslim.” Haha, I tell her I pray. Ah shat, they are walking outside. All queen, one trany. Haha. She now has a man voice. Sorry, he now has a man voice.
Sin Bar
Soft Jazz plays. Back in the bar.
Description of other two queens @ Crystal Ball. Well, the trany playing the guitar had a back up. A South American looking, tangerine thumping, weird Black Adder hair, and black jeans, black shirt, with teeth like the gay guy from Gentleman Bronco. The kind of look like: he is the whipped, beaten, gay sex slave. The other guy…
Wait 2 cute girls walk in. Darker girl has a guitar. Sexy German. Other is blonde and shorter but cute.
So #3 queen, tall spiky short blonde hair, clean shaved with a black fishnet T-shirt and leggings. Short, short, short with light almost neon green shorts. Lol… Berlin Queens.
“I am stressing, I am becoming German,” Alan says, also telling me to stay. He likes my shirt, says it looks “Gay” though.
Topic, women who can’ speak.
>Helen Keller… Ann Frank. An inspiration to all. Imagine if Helen Keller worked @ a burlesque… I bet she would give the best hand jobs. - Alan laughs.
>I don’t get it really. I mean Steve Wonders… Ray Charles, blind and they wore sunglasses. <Ya >I mean deaf people don’t wear ear muffs. <Well, their ears look perfectly fine. And blind people well – he makes a funny face and blinks with his eyes moving rapidly. We went to the blind Jewish museum earlier. Alan and I walk outside to smoke, I follow. I tell him some Helen Keller jokes. Then I think of my own. I’ll tell it later. Some guy approaches from the street just after Sophia comes out for a smoke, asks for a cigarette. I give him one. I ask what he does…
We talk about 2 girls 1 cup
… he said he just got out of school with an architectural design degree. Alan gives him a light so he can smoke. Then the guy says he is a waiter because he can’t get a “fucking job that he went to school for.” His light did not last on the burnt cigarette. I tell him that most Americans are in the position. He bites the end of the cigarette and spits the filter out. Asks for the lighter again and successfully lights. Then walks “pissed off” down the street.
So… the joke: So my grandfather told me about this girl he saw briefly back in the “war”. He being German, her being Jewish. Said it was the most “silent sex” he had ever had. “Didn’t make one sound, granted we were at her parents’ house.” Ya what was her name, I asked. “Ann Frank,” He said, “didn’t last long, her and I ya know.”
The crowd cheers for dancing! Not the singing. I am at the world’s largest karaoke! Outdoors, Berlin, Mauer Park.
Jus had a sausage. Alan smokes a “fag” and now drinks a beer. Old man with a beard performs now, girl with nice butt stand in front of my face; nice blue jacket. Crowd cheers. Two boys (3 or 4 years old) pull up grass and play in the dirt, ti’s full of rocks but mostly cigarette butts. Old man sings the version of “My Way.” Crowd likes this way, it’s in German. There has to be at least 5,000 people gathered, probably 8,000. A couple kissy faces to my right. “There’s a guy you see him here every week,” Alan says. An Asian guy w/ black puffy squares on his jacket, black hat, black glasses, black leather pants. Soft sound in his voice.
Okay I just talked Alan into buying a karaoke machine.
Build a website, Online live karaoke! Fuck’n brilliant
Guy from Montreal just sang Britney Spears “hit me baby one more time,” Great! Everybody sang along. Best song so far. Thank you white Canadian.
Oh shit! There’s a fart in my ass. I say and turn around. It’s okay, I say, I’m just not use to it.
Bearpikaraoke
“Mini the moocher” song
So Called (band name), “party over there” song
It’s dark. I’m drunk (“pissed” we refer to being drunk) and sexy girl was dancing wildly SEXY HOT! Alan’s talking to some older woman. He could do better. Shite, he’s drunk. Oh well, he’s a grown man; though drunk, he knows what he is doing. I guess?
Wow, if you could only hear the SHIT this guy is saying to impress this girl. I, we laugh and make fun of him. They hear us and continue on. The girl has a 6 year old kid back at home. Cute but I wonder is she had a C-section.
Ich mag deine schunhen Wills du mich ficken - I like your shoes, do you want to fuck me
(ish mag dine-a shoon vill-s do mick fick-en)
Today, October 3rd, is the reunification of East & West Berlin. And here I am! Berlin MFer! Now at Green Mango Karaoke bar. Place is packed. Haha, total of 12 people, including staff.
Mango Jerry 048605
Neil Diamond 079409
Ourlady Peace 701341
Journey 700987
Maroon 5 521712
Radiohead EN_SR-0615
Rollingstones cen1392
Sublime 707890/708791
3 dog night 206104
Toadies 710033
Orienburgerstrsse, bar named “Tacheless” art gallery upstairs
Directions: Down the U-Bahn, station Gneisenaustrasse which is U7, Above a café called Cuccamn
Address: Zoggener Str. 34, Berlin, Berlin 10961
AMERICAN SECTOR
A Penis candle burns on the table, so does an elf/nome w/ a red cylinder hat w/ white dots. Artist live here, I came for cake and coffee. Local Berliners
Sort of Revolution
Simon Nikolaus
Earthling = movie
Berlin Wall, writings:
He who wants the world to remain as it is. Doesn’t want it to remain at all.
The wall
Holocaust Museum
Heinrich Hemller
Auschwitz
Murdered 5.4 – 6 million
Sobibor
Kulmhof
Lubin – Majdanck
Belzec
Treblinka
Maly Trostenes
Babij Jar
Contact Ian. Moshie house in Berlin!
Awesome, once again Alan you have out done yourself. Bluegrass concert tonight w/ one of your ex-g’s and I. Guy with Banjo and long beard looks glorious on stage. American by observation.
Late night German TV.
Naked Women!
Heimathanfen, concert hall U-Bahn goes straight to it. Soft porn. Not the good stuff. Rathus stop from the U-Bahn. Sexy Sports Clips. 10 disc collector’s edition
<We do love our women don’t we. >Ya, I’d go mad if there weren’t women on this world. <No. You’d go gay. – Lol - <Okay, mad.
<Sorry I don’t mean to be rude, I’m English. Well, only deliberately rude. – He said after finishing his cigarette before I.
Now after great tasting pizza. We watch old school burlesque. Petty Page, I never new till now. Sin Bar.
Tits. I wonder when breast implants began. Early 90’s maybe. I have only felt one pair of breast implants, David as well. To me, hard as a rock.
Writing in front of people attacks them to read this.
Ali, Canadian. Cute, tall, beautiful.
^ I am so sic of Drama >But yet it’s laying there in your bed < Or not – Lol. She has a French Boyfriend, Ex-boyfriend actually. French, ha. Fucking assholes! Cheat on their girlfriends. ^They go out 4 times a week with their guys and fuck other women >And yet you dated a French guy. ^I know, idiot right.
Burlesque
Vampire Weekend, band
Let me tell you a little Something something about Sin Bar. Liquor bottles hold candles that drip wax down the sides of bottle and build up like volcanoes forming new land masses. So… The guy from Virginia that played at the bluegrass/country/jazz concert just walked in and preformed. Fucking great. Violin tonight, banjo/violin the other night. I talk to the guitarist, then the guy from Virginia. Starving artist! Great people. Guitarist is a poet.
Russell, my new name.
Erin, Virginia guy.
Story written by Erin:
Biding the lettuce adieu,
My dear green friends, you were naught but a vehicle for the dressing. You were not but a vehicle for the dressing. -
Something else he wrote:
I can recommend a place to you where people live their lives. This guy is completely satisfied with everything that’s happening. How many layers are there? They are born with these. People do that and they are not scared. I’ll do that again when some time when no one is looking. Not being afraid of anything. Getting old and losing touch with life happiness. Misunderstanding.
Now the guitarist/poet writes something in German and in cursive handwriting. I can not read it so…
Texan, Comrad. The owner of Sin Bar. Great bar, great man. Talked to him for about an hour. He’s 53 and looks young! Looks late to mid 30’s. Grad from UNT (University of North Texas) Denton, Electronics. Lived in New York. Became ill, almost died. Spinal problems. Top 4 vertebrae. Recovered, made a living playing base.
Friedelstr 12
T__
Kopi
Kopenickerstrsse, this weekend to Sunday
International airport
Train from Copenhagen to Sweden, 15 minutes. Cheap & easy. Research.
Sunday 9 at night
Lagari (Neukolla)
Pflugerstr x Nansenstr
Rathaus Ramblers
Coffee break. >Now there’s an attractive looking girl. Nice butt, nice legs, great posture… - “Oh!” we say together in unison. She turned around. >That’s disappointing. T-Mobil girl.
Guitar shop
Ceutus
Kanststr.
CS_BahuBogen Saugiuyplatz
I am now traveling “Back to the Future.” I am standing behind an old Delorean. Mardi McFly!
Book, “A Brief History About Everything.”
NAG-Rennsportwagen. Bj 1913, 80 km/h, 4 zylinder
Eldorado Seville
Hispano-Suiza H6B/H6C open tourer
Zaandf.
Zaudvoortou Zee, town
Egrout au Zee, town
Stay here by the sea, 15 to 10 minute dry ride to Amsterdam
Haarlem another great city
David Stroud 015122964479
Brittini De Rossi 3662538817
Wo brenntes? – Where is the fire?
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